It is better to practice a little than talk a lot.

This topic makes me think of the concept of a promise ring. I know someone who had been going out with her boyfriend for a few years and her boyfriend gave her a promise ring. This was meant to be a promise that by the end of the year, he would pay lobola and marry her. He asked her to speak to her family and organize her uncles. There was a lot of buzz going on about this promise to marry her. The end of year came and passed, the guy said nothing. Years went by, but still nothing happened. Guys who were interested in the girl considered her to be out of the market because of the promise ring she was wearing. This was an empty promise; she finally saw the light and took off the ring.

The worst thing about this situation is that the guy might have known he had no intentions of marrying her. He brought up her hopes and didn't even tell her when he couldn't deliver on his promise. I respect a man who keeps his word and is not selfish deceiving a woman of his intentions. Rather tell the girl if you cannot afford to pay lobola and marry her. She will love you for your honesty. Talk is cheap!

Four seasons of loneliness

Do you have that one friend who always tries to convince herself that she doesn't want to be in a relationship? She lies to herself claiming she cannot commit herself to a partner. She wants to be an independent woman and doesn't want to give up her freedom. The reality is that everyone has been through the phase of not having someone special in their life. It doesn't mean you don't want someone in your life; you're just having a 'draught'. The term 'draught' means there's absolutely no-one interested in you, there's no-one interesting enough for you to date. No-one is calling you and whispering sweet nothings to you.

No-one can live alone forever you go to parties, weddings, gatherings people come with their partners. Invitations to events or functions are made to you and a partner. When you're not in a relationship, there will be days where you will feel lonely. You can't always have one night stands; everyone deserves to have that special person in their lives. This person will call you, you can confide in them and you know someone has your back no matter what.

You can't spend the rest of your life being single, always being the spare wheel. Loneliness is a sad feeling and sometimes it cause people to do stupid things. Some people because of loneliness they want to break other people's relationships. Loneliness causes people to be envious of other people's belongings. It is such a beautiful feeling knowing you are loved.

Wedding cake in-the-middle-of-the-road.

This topic reminds me when I was planning my wedding. People always think of the actual wedding and forget the difficulty of planning it. Single women who are planning a wedding this is for you.

For my wedding, most of the things went smoothly despite the fact that my husband-to-be was staying in Cape Town and I was staying in Jo'burg. The wedding was going to take place in Durban. Reality is that when there's going to be a wedding something is bound to go wrong. A wedding is like any other event you have ever planned in your life. Things are not delivered on time, important people cannot be contacted, catering did not confirm the menu, no make-up artist and the list goes on.

For me, it was the person designing our rings. We had met him on a flight when we were coming back from Bangkok. He told us he was a jewelry designer and owns a shop in Pretoria. At the time, we had just gotten engaged. He had some diamond stones and a catalogue with him so he showed us his work of art. We made an appointment with him on what we wanted and got our rings designed. On my to-do list, I thought one more thing down to worry about.

Little did I know that a month before the wedding, we would still not have the rings. Less than a month before the wedding, we couldn't get hold of our designer and we didn't know how far he was with the rings. He was in Pretoria and at this time we were in Durban. The best man had to go to collect the rings in Pretoria. The rings only arrived two days before the wedding.

The question I want to pose to single women planning a wedding, would you still get married without the wedding cake? If the rings were not there on time, I would have still married my groom. Marriage is about love and not all about the beautiful decorations that are at the wedding.

Umntu ngumntu ngabantu!

Our society associates white people as having luxurious things i.e. expensive cars, mansions, traveling the world, eating good food basically living the life. It is a foreign concept to black people that a white person can struggle financially. There's always the misconception that all white people are rich. This is putting people on a pedestal and expecting them to act in a certain way. This also applies to black people who have a certain materialistic status; they are expected to be snobbish. There's a stereotype that wealthy people are snobs.

People cannot accept seeing a wealthy person whether black or white being humble. I often hear people saying if they had certain materialistic things, they would behave differently. People have a wrong perception that when you gain material things, you should become a snob.

People should learn to remain humble as they become successful. This helps when you fall, you will have people to help you up. It is easier to ask for help when you are humble and people will be willing to assist you. People will not judge you for your misfortune. It is important to have ubuntu. It is cold up there especially if you are on your own, the higher the altitude the colder it gets. Money or material things should not change you.

Material things don't matter, it is important to have ubuntu. As the saying goes "umntu ngumntu ngabantu".